Friday, 29 April 2016

part-4, me and my father...keep hurting each other.

having suffered from each and every account in my life, I am suffering and struggling in the account of my father too. and that too very emotionally.
well see the case of today.
I was boiling the milk, when father entered in the kitchen, I just said in fun, "will you watch the milk?" he replied angrily, he said yes why not. afterall I am a pet dog, and it is the duty of a pet dog to take care of every single thing in the house..
(saying someone a dog is a tremendous insult in my region, I never expected this kind of very rough type reply from him)
i felt seriously hurt with this reply.. i never thought that my father will reply like that, whatever i said was in fun only. i never meant to hurt my father,, ofcourse my father have taken my words in some kind of other way, which may have hurt him. that is why he replied like that..

to be true, both me and my father are very good person. i respect my father too much. i love him very very much. because he is the most honest person of this world. he never did any kind of cheat in account of money in his service (government job) of many many years. and yes today many many persons respect him because of his honesty. my father also admit that his son is like a diamond. he say these words to others (excluding me).
but yes,, whenever we both met, we just quarrel only. we both are just opposite of each other. neither of our hobbies and interests ever met. this is why clashes between him and me keep happening.

i am just tired of this kind of life. i have respect for him, i want to change the things around me, i want to change the way things are going. and yes for it i have already done whatever i can.
but today it seems to me that no matter whatever i do, no matter how many efforts i put to change,, but neither of the circumstances will ever go to any change.

i have already suffered too much in the matter of love. way much more than anyone else. kindly see those sufferings here
(explained in very short)

kindly see the above link, and if possible then please read the other links also. i am ruined. i am ruined. i suffered in friendship terribly, i suffered in matter of love very sadly, and i am suffering in family matters also.
god please please i beg you please i beg you too much, too much, god you are free to punish me with a rod, you can beat me with it, if i have done something wrong in my previous birth. but please god, please stop all these kind of sufferings. please god. i beg you. i beg you...